What is happening. Why you should care. How you can help.
There are sooooo many CREEPERS with fake profiles who have "disabled fetishes". They ALWAYS have about one picture of a hot girl/guy in a chair/crutches & no pictures tagged of themselves other than spam. Most of them seem to randomly have german-sounding names and generally they are GROSS old dudes posing as hot girls. When you deny/delete one, you'll get bombarded by about a dozen requests from similar (and fake) profiles.
The Secret World of Disability Trolls: Pretenders, Stalkers, and Predators
is a easy reading booklet that exposes the victimization of the Disability Community by predators on Facebook.
READ IT ON FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=491209694248014&set=a.491209680914682.95807.448284155207235&type=3&theater
DOWNLOAD AS A PDF FILE:
VIEW IT ON BRAINSHARK:
Wheelchair Pretenders – People who pretend to have a disability. The most common Pretender is someone who deceives people into thinking they are a wheelchair user. Pretending to be an amputee is also common.
Coercive Devotees – Devotees are people that are attracted to people with disabilities specifically because of the existence of the disability. Coercive Devotees engage in disrespectful and anti-social behavior such as stealing personal photographs of people with disabilities, uploading those photographs to websites, stalking people with disabilities, deceiving people with disabilities, and engaging in other unwanted behavior.
Disability Fetish – People who have an unusual sexual attraction to actual or pretend disability.
Disability Stalkers – People who actively seek out and stalk people with disabilities.
The following information was provided to me from a Devotee who is very knowledgable on this subject.
In this piece I am trying to give you simple definitions, with simple words so everybody can understand, though I have written about the subject at length on my blog.
Devotees – Devotees are people who are attracted in some way by disability. This can be one disability, or many disabilities. Some people are attracted only to the disability, and some are not. Some devotees are more attracted by the equipment that people with disabilities use than by the disability. For some they just like seeing people use crutches or a wheelchair even if they don't really need it.
Pretenders – Some people pretend they have a disability to get out of going to work, or to avoid the army. These people aren't pretenders. Pretenders are people who pretend they have a disability only because they enjoy it. Sometimes though a devotee online will pretend to be disabled to trick other disabled people into sharing their photos or videos with them. These are not pretenders, these are coercive devotees.
Not all devotees are coercive. Some will be honest with you about their feelings, and some will just leave you alone. Some devotees don't care though, and will try to trick you or film and photograph you when you aren't looking. I had a friend who was a pretender and she was stalked by one of these devotees, and I know of one other pretender who had it happen too.
Be careful who you add as a friend online, and what you allow the public to see."
One of the biggest and most dangerous problems with the Trolls is predatory men who prey upon unsuspecting women with disabilities on Facebook and other internet social networking sites. Typically, these men pretend be women with similar disabilities. They use this disability guise to “befriend” the target women. The target woman believes she is chatting or corresponding with a woman when in fact she is dealing with a man. This type of situation is a violation of the target woman’s trust. She may divulge person details to the Pretender about her health or other personal details. She may divulge her home address and thus allow an internet stalker to become a physical stalker. The list of potential dangers goes on and on.
The second major problem is the stealing of personal photographs. Many times these stolen photographs are uploaded to Disability Fetish and Disability Porn websites. For example, the Troll becomes a Facebook friend with an attractive woman wheelchair user. The Troll then searches the woman’s photographs and downloads beach or bikini type photographs. These photographs are next uploaded to websites frequented by other Trolls.
The most effective means to stop the Troll Virus is to systemically BLOCK known and suspected Trolls on your Friend list.
This post provides some tips for spotting a Wheelchair Pretender on Facebook.
1. Profile Picture - The profile picture is the first clue. Many times the Pretender will use a picture that prominently features the person in a wheelchair. The picture will be either of poor quality or a stock photograph. By comparison, the majority of profile pictures from real WC users, do NOT feature the persons wheelchair. Or if they do, the wheelchair is incidental.
This document lists tips for spotting Wheelchair Pretenders on Facebook.
2. Very few supporting photographs of themselves. Especially, no photographs with themselves with other wheelchair uses or at events.
3. Prominent listing of disability. Most real WC users do not consider their disability as their primary identifying character. Pretenders do.
4. Lots of Facebook friends with disabilities, especially women.
5. Joins lots of disability groups. Has mainly disability related interests.
6. Very little activity on profile page other than “friending”.
7. Posts that refer mainly to “disability issues”.
8. A male who only has FBFs with female WCs. If find it highly unlikely that a male WC user would only have female WC friends.
9. Writing stupid disability related stuff on their profile page. Possibilily filled with cliches and other BS.
10. Profile and other pictures that are small and low res as if they were copied from a web page.
ERIK - hey. I just got back from a bike ride.
ERIK - you there?
MARIA - yeap
ERIK - so I have a theory.
MARIA - about what
ERIK - You are not really a SCI.
MARIA - why do you think so
ERIK - If I tell you, you wil be able to change and fake more people.
I also think you are a guy.
MARIA - why
ERIK - because one of my hobbies is finding Wheelchair Pretenders and Devotees.
MARIA - hobby? oh ok
ERIK - So I can warn other SCI about people like you.
MARIA - im not a devotee
ERIK - you are a Wheelchair Pretender.
MARIA - why should do something like that
im usin a chair because i need it
ERIK - you are full of shit and a guy.
MARIA - i cant change ur idea can i
ERIK - Nope.
MARIA - im totally a quad woman
thats why u added me to yuor groups
ERIK - I added you before I figured out you were a Pretender. It wasn't hard to figure out. Now I have removed you.
MARIA - u can remove me from your groups but u cant undeservedly blame me
waitin for an answer
ERIK - Look. Anyone who fakes having SCI and fools other people has a serious problem.
You need to see a psychologist.
MARIA - u should
just saying to somebody that he is "pretender" without any evidence
is only devotee pretender phobia
This true story was written by TIFFANY CARLSON.
I have been hesitant about sharing my story regarding my stalker, scared he’ll read this. Why do I care? Because that’s the power that stalkers have over you: Fear. But since it’s been a year since he came to my home unannounced, I’m a bit less scared than I once was.
I want to fight back. I need to stop caring that he’s still out there and always will be until he dies. He lingers everywhere I am online.
I first made my presence known to my stalker back in the mid ’90s. At that time, I had no idea who Devotees (wheelchair fetishists) or Pretenders (people who pretend to use a wheelchair, on or offline) were. Of course, now I know that online rooms are full of them. The creepiest of them all was a guy by the name of D.T. At the time he was pretending to be a pretty, long-haired burnette from L.A who was a graphic designer for Pixar.
His persona privately messaged me, and from there on out, we carried on a one year long online friendship. We chatted every day and shared our paralyzed war stories. It was pretty intense.
One day, I was bored and popped into the AOL disability chat room. I was talking about my friend, and instantly, people in the room were telling me that she was a Pretender and actually a crazy forty something white male from California. I was shocked and appalled. I knew these people wouldn’t lie about something like that. I felt sickened and betrayed.
D.T. figured out that I knew about his game. He wrote me a long email apologizing for his transgressions, saying he’d take me to Disney World to make it up to me.
His assumptions freaked me out even more, so I blocked his email. Years went past and he continued to use dozens of fake personas to try to trick me again. He used Yahoo IM, emails under new addresses, everything. His main goal was to know intimate details about me so he could masturbate to them.
I’ve been running my site www.beautyability.com for several years. He would visit every day. I figured out that the California IP that came to my site each morning was him. He would post comments on my blog under a few different pseudonyms, but he never varied his grammar or speech patterns so I always knew it was him. But since the guy seemed “sorta” harmless at the time, I decided to stop deleting his comments and let them stay. That proved to be a bad idea. He took that action by me as a sign that I was actually receptive towards him.
After reading in a blog somewhere that I was single again, he decided to pack-up and move to Minnesota to find me in person. I’m unlisted. He didn’t have my address. He printed out some pictures of my neighborhood that I had put in one of my blogs. He walked around downtown Minneapolis until he found the buildings that were in the pictures. He visited all of those buildings until he found the one that had my name in the foyer. That was at 10:30am, August 7th, 2008.
He rang my unit, telling me that he was some guy that was here to “warn me” about this crazy guy from California who’s been stalking me. He was just lying again. It was he who was the crazy guy. I told him to go away, that I was busy, and to email me whatever his story was.
He did. I read his email later in the day and realized it was HIM, even though he never said so. His grammar though, as I said before, never wavered. It was easy to figure out. He was also seen frequently in my neighborhood wandering around the next few days.
I obtained a restraining order the afternoon of the day he first came to my house. Not only was it quite easy to get the restraining order, the police found the hotel he was staying at to serve him. They went there, served him and demanded he leave me alone. They told him to leave the state.
The police said D.T. was shaking in his boots when they served him. It seemed to work. He ended up not being able to find a job and moved to Arizona. It’s been a year since all of this went down. He has only tried to comment on my blog twice.
Even through, I haven’t heard from him now in awhile. I still get scared when I’m in bed at night and hear weird noises. I’m worried in the back of my mind that he might come back to Minneapolis, desperate to finally meet me in-person, and break into my place.
Because of this decade-long ill journey with this stalker, I RARELY if ever talk to people I don’t know in-person online anymore. It’s the only way I can protect myself from this happening again.
I hope my story helps people to be more vigilant about who they trust online, and to show them that Devotees and Pretenders are NOTHING to take lightly.
Tara, a pretty young paraplegic, moves through her house to her beautiful sunny bedroom. She logs on to her Facebook account. She scans her computer briefly and then enters a post about her frustrating day.
Immediately, the chat window pops up. Next to the profile picture of a smiling attractive woman is the soothing statement “It will get better. I know. I’ve been there”. It’s Camille. Camille contacted Tara a few weeks ago through Facebook. She introduced herself and openly wrote about the car accident which broke her back two years ago.
Tara was hesitant at first. But with Camille’s gentle encouragement, Tara was soon telling Camille details about her injury, her health issues, and her hopes and dreams. After all, unlike all her other friends, Camille had been through it too.
Tara gushes about her difficult day. Camille listens patiently and offers supporting words.
The conversation turns to Tara’s Facebook profile. Why are there so few “wheelchair pictures”? Where are the fun and sexy photographs? At Camille’s prompting, Tara searches her computer. She finds photos from her last trip to the beach. With Camille egging her on, Tara uploads her best one.
Clyde sits by his computer in a dark basement apartment. Clyde downloads then prints a picture of a girl wearing a bikini, sitting in a wheelchair on the beach. It’s Tara. Clyde takes the photograph and pins it to a large map on the wall. The map is filled with pictures of women in wheelchairs. Most of the pictures are labeled with names and home addresses.
Clyde types on his computer “What’s your address? I have something I want to send you.”
Tara’s chat window pops up. It’s Camille “What’s your address? I have something I want to send you.”
The problem stems from when the relationship is one-sided and not consensual. If someone is too young to consent, or one person is coercive, then relationship is predator-like. If the relationship is based on one-sided attraction, then it is not consensual.
As a Group, the Devotee/PWD relationship is not consensual. While there may be many examples of consensual Devotee/PWD relationships, they do not represent the majority.
Devotee/PWD relationships are more often characterized by a one-sided attraction where the PWD may not even be aware of the existence of the Devotee and/or his or her sexually based attraction.
Healthy relationships are based on mutual respect, trust, and disclosure. Unhealthy relationships involve deception, lack of trust, and non-disclosure. Unhealthy relationships are detrimental to both parties, but are more damaging to the unwilling object of attraction.
The current state of the group Devotee/PWD relationship is unhealthy. It is unquestionably harmful to PWDs. I think it is also harmful to Devotees because many of them operate in a secretive and voyeuristic manner at best, and a coercive and predator-like manner at worst.
It all comes down to consent. If a PWD consents to a “friendship” or relationship with a respectful Devotee, then there is no problem. If the PWD doesn’t consent, he or she should be left alone, period. That is how all healthy and consensual relationships work. If a Devotee doesn’t disclose due to fear of rejection, then he or she is involved in a one-sided non-consensual relationship regardless of how “innocent” or “harmless” he or she may feel.
As a final note, I am noting saying that full disclosure is easy. If it was easy, then we would not be having this discussion. But comparatively speaking, the obstacles faced by many PWDs everyday are greater. Why create more problems for PWDs? If you truly care about PWDs, then you should be doing all you can to support them even if it makes you uncomfortable or seems difficult.
Woman and men gets thousands of requests a day from those who are attracted to them for whatever reason, and men and woman will hide their identity and lie about who they say they are on the internet. This is trait of dishonest people who desperately want to get the attention of those they seek and feel that have no other way. I had a request just yesterday from a “devo” who used his real name and location! Yes, he had other girls in wheelchairs as friends, and yes, he asked about my injury. He was actually a handsome guy who if I had not been in a relationship, I may have considered friending.
I guess I am just not a fan of broad brushes on groups of people. Maybe you should do a BlogSpot about decent men and woman who happen to be attracted to a disability for whatever psychological reason and even explore these men and ask them about their lives and their loves. You will find that many of them have long term relationships, marriages and families. While I didn’t even know about this until like 2006, when I look back with this information, I figure I may have dated, or been friends of devos and didn’t even know it. I wouldn’t have changed those relationships and am glad I didn’t fear or pre-judge.
Yes, my photos have been stolen too and I have seen them on these devotee sites. I am just living my life in them and share them publically on my page. To me it appears they are sharing pics of woman who they think are beautiful and if you look at the pics, most are exceptionally so. :)) They do have good taste, I will give them that! Not sure this is anymore “creepy” or different from men enjoying pics of their favorite actress or model and posting them in their fb or on their private computer. Men like to look at beautiful woman who are doing things they find sexy.
Yes, some are distasteful and disgusting. But not all ab porn sites are pretty to look at either (do I really need to go there?) So like I said, taste varies from person to person. Not good to judge all based on the bad behavior of some. If we did, we would never procreate loll!
I get concerned about the only negative reviews on devos as many newbies will be wary and afraid in general and may discriminate and potentially lose the opportunity for a good friend, lover, or soul mate (yes even soul mates share attraction to each other in the first stage). I have several friends who are married to these “devos” and know one guy who professed to me was a devo who was married until his wife died.
I think another girlfriend of mine is dating one based on how they met and other signs, and she is very happy. So let’s not make them all out to be creeps. Two on my gf’s have children with these guys and they are great husbands and dads. I say, whatever rocks their boat and works for them, as long as they don’t hurt anyone and their attraction is not an obsession (like a porn fetish that is all consuming) or the whole focus of their relationship with nothing else going for it (do you really think Melania loves Donald Trump and vice versa for more than his money and her looks?)
The problem is they hide “in the devo closet” as they will face condemnation, anger and rejection if they admit who they are. So it is a catch 22 for them. Think 1950's gay men. They lied and many still do...as our society has a problem understanding nuances and variations of the “norm”.
I always knew there was something different about my attractions. Other people didn’t get turned on by the same things I did. I lived in secrecy and fear that someone would find out for my entire early life. When I finally found that I was not the only one, that there were other people who had the experience I did, the only thing to be found out about them was that people hated them.
So that was a great way to come of age. Welcome to the world, you’ll be hated, feared and called horrible names on the Internet. Enjoy!
Every dating moment for me is fraught with ethical concerns. My peers talk about cute guys and I can’t relate. Could I tell them, you know who’s hot? Jake Sully from Avatar. Yummy.
Well, me being me, that’s exactly what I do.
I decided to stop living in shadows and to own this label. And one of the reasons I decided to do that is because all you ever hear about in the media are the “bad” devs. The “disability trolls” as they are called here.
It is my belief that very few of the over all people who have this attraction are scary creeps. But some of them are. And those few are the most vocal and the most noticeable because of their unethical behavior. If we make the world a safe place for devs, if we don’t attack and hate on them, then more of the “good” ones will feel comfortable being themselves.
In my opinion, this will force the “bad” devs out of the main focus. They will become the marginal ones that they should be instead of the focus.
It sucks, but there are creeps in every area of life. No matter what group you go into, you’ll find some small percentage of wackos. As someone with thigh length hair, let me tell you that I get creepy messages on YouTube videos. I get my pictures taken from my facebook page and reposted on fetish sites. I hate that. Of course I do. And my hair is something that I made a choice to have. So I know where you’re coming from when you are upset at devotees.
When PushGirls had an episode about watching out for those freaks, I wrote the following on twitter: “Not all devs are bad. You know what all devs are? Human beings. With feelings. So hate on individuals, not on groups.”
Hate the guy that stalks you. Don’t hate all devotees . Befriend good devotees, make the Internet a safe place for them to come out to you so that we can work together as a team to make better relationships between the groups.
Devotees and people with disabilities can have great relationships. I’ve dated a number of disabled men (and I’ve always been completely upfront about being a dev). I have friendships with many disabled men and women. I am dedicated to civil rights for disability issues and I work hard on that cause. Together we can do great things.
I cannot regulate devotee behavior. I don’t have control over other people. There is no central authority! I advice young devs that I meet to be ethical, to get to know people who have disabilities so that they aren’t romanticizing the experience in their minds. Some of these “bad” devs are simply uneducated. Others are evil. But trolls thrive on secrecy and fear. The more open we can be, the more they will be marginalized and not become the majority experience.
I implore you to also realize that being a devotee is not easy. It isn’t something that we do for fun. It’s a deep part of us that we can’t help and a lot of times it sucks.
Imagine that everywhere you go on the Internet you see people spewing hate about you. Calling youa pervert, a freak, a freaky deaky, and they’ve never met you. You’ve never hurt anyone.
But wait. You do know what it’s like to be treated badly based on something that you had no control over. It amazes me when people with disabilities are willing to turn that prejudice against other groups.
You may have heard or come up with your own theories about why devotees exist. They are wrong.
Devoteeism is not the result of abuse and it is not a power game for having control over someone else. The devotees who adore you see you as more powerful than they are, stronger than they are, more to be admirered (hence the term “admirer”). They are in awe of you.
I had a very normal upbringing. There was nothing in it to suggest I would have this attraction. I didn’t even know anyone with a disability until years after the attraction began. If you are willing to be open minded, I would ask you to read my book (W)hole. It is the story of a young woman who is a dev and it explores what it is really like to be one. A new edition will be out in early October. Just search for (W)hole by Ruth Madison after October 10th and you’ll get the most up to date version.
The short answer to this question is that they have been “Zuckered”. Publically, Mark Zuckerburg’s mission is to “make the world a more open and connected place”. But if that is the case, why is it impossible to reach Facebook? There is no available phone number, no method to online chat, no office to visit, no direct method to contact Facebook other than automated form submission. Despite the spin marketing, Facebook knows that it is NOT always in your best interest to be able to be found and contacted by ANYONE at ANYTIME.
average two hundred private messages before the Predator is stopped, then the PPR is 1/200. As long as VLR is greater than PPR, Predators will be able to thrive and prey upon victims on Facebook.